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Edward Cullen meets Dinuguan

Today, my life with Edward Cullen took an incredibly surprising turn when Edward admitted to being hungry. He planned to go out hunting but since it is a glorious sunny day outside, he couldn’t. I didn’t want him to get captured and killed by the Volturi. I mean, we all know he sparkles under the sun. I did not want to frighten the neighbours in case Edward exposes his awesome vampire sparkle. I mean, come on…his sparkle is awesome.

Edward sparkles under the sun.

Edward sparkles under the sun.

I was torn. I can’t keep him in the house hungry. I have children. He may not be able to restrain himself. What would a mother do?

Of course…I have to think of an alternative. Edward drinks animal blood…where can I get or order some animal blood? Jollibee? No. McDonald’s? No. Chowking? No. Pizza Hut? No. Red Ribbon…

Aha! Just a few calls and I can have his meal delivered.

I hope that this risk works…it should work.

When his food arrived, I took it out of the package and transferred it lovingly on a nice bowl.

“Edward! Your food is ready.” I called.

“You hunted for me? How did you get a mountain lion in the metropolis?” Edward answered with eyes so black, it scared me. He IS hungry.

“No. I ordered something for you.” I replied.

“You ordered something for me? Have you forgotten that I am a vampire? There is nothing in restaurants you can order for me.” Edward responded.

“In the Philippines, there is…” I replied. Then, I presented him with his food.

Edward Cullen sees his meal--the dinuguan.

Edward Cullen sees his meal--the dinuguan.

“Here, try this. It’s called dinuguan or pork blood stew. I can have the coke if you don’t want it.”

“Oh…” Edward said as he curiously examined my offering. “This is new. Why is it black?”

“Well, the blood has been cooked. Why don’t you try it? It is still hot…I know you like your food warm.” I encouraged.

“I smell garlic and chilis…” Edward replied.

“Is that a problem? I can take them out for you.” I offered.

“No. You know that the vampires and garlic theory is not true.” Edward responded.

“Go ahead, Edward. Eat…I mean, drink.” I said.

Edward bent over and devoured the dinuguan in lightning speed. After his meal, he looked up. His eyes were golden again.

Edward smiled his crooked smile and said “I like it here in Manila. Even the people eat and drink blood.”

I’m glad my risk worked. Thank goodness for dinuguan!

Edward Cullen meets Manny Pacquiao

I was very excited to receive my Time 100 Most Influential issue for 2009. I was so glad to see that our very own Manny Pacquiao made the Time 100 Heroes and Icons list. His tribute article was written by no less than former world boxing champion Lennox Lewis himself. I shared this information with my hubby who said that President Gloria Arroyo may declare May 8 as a non-working holiday to celebrate Manny Pacquiao Day. Feeling a bit out of place, Edward politely inquired who Manny Pacquiao is. My hubby and I looked at him in utter disbelief.

“You do not know Manny Pacquiao? How long have you been living under a huge boulder?” my hubby replied.

“To be fair, I have been extremely preoccupied with fighting the Volturi, raising a vampire baby and learning how to desensitize myself from werewolves’ smells,” Edward replied. “I didn’t have time to watch ESPN.”

“Oh, Edward,” I said, “it’s such a travesty! You have to get to know Manny Pacquiao. He is the best boxer who ever lived. Here,” I added, “let me show you what Manny Pacquiao can do.”

I quickly turned my computer on and showed him this TeamPilipinas video of the legendary Pacquiao-Hatton fight.

“Wow, that is phenomenal! He is lightning fast and obviously very strong.” Edward said.

“Obviously,” I replied. “How do you think you would fare in a fight with Pacquiao? You’re a vampire with mindreading powers after all.”

“ I am a vampire and I am stronger than the average human but after seeing that fight…” his voice trailed off. “…even I am scared of him. He has my highest regard.”

“You can also do incredible things, Edward. Remember these?” I said as I showed him these two photos.

Edward saves Bella from certain death.

Edward saves Bella from a car crash.

Edward saves Bella from James.

Edward saves Bella from James

“You saved Bella from certain death twice.”

“Yeah, I did. I guess that makes me a bit of a hero too, huh?” Edward replied.

“I’d say. This gives me an idea…can you do something for me?” I asked.

“Tell me what you want, and you can have it.” Edward replied.

“I want a photo of my two heroes of the day.” I said and Edward obliged.

Edward Cullen and Manny Pacquiao

Edward Cullen and Manny Pacquiao

Edward Cullen's Labor Day Message

When I woke up later than usual this morning, Edward politely asked why today is a holiday in the Philippines. I told him that May 1st is Labor Day. He was quite surprised since Labor Day in the United States is celebrated on the first Monday of September. I told him that most of the world celebrate Labor Day on May 1st.

I also told him that the way we observe Labor Day is different from the US. We don’t have picnics and parties in Manila. In fact, during Labor Day, labor unions and movements march the streets to present their causes and to celebrate (if any) their successes. Edward politely corrected me and said that they also have similar festivities during Labor Day. Edward pensively walked towards the Twilight calendar now set to the month of May. After a few moments, he told me that he has a message for the admirable men and women who fight for workers’ rights.

Edward welcomes the month of May.

Edward welcomes the month of May.

“Be safe.” Edward said.

Have a great Labor Day, everyone.

Edward Cullen Goes Online

My life with Edward Cullen took a funny turn today when I personally witnessed the defensive Edward Cullen in action.

I was on one of my daily Twilight/New-Moon/Robert-Pattinson-related research rituals when Edward asked if he could also go online; apparently, he wanted to check his email. Knowing that he can read my mind, I sent him a signal that maybe he could buy me a present using his Platinum credit card. He gave me one of his crooked smiles. After recovering from the hyperventilation caused by his awesome smile, I graciously lent him my iTouch since given his size, the iTouch is perfect for him.

Not long after, I heard Edward growl…you got that right…he growled. I looked over to see what the commotion was about and I saw this.

Edward sees the werewolves.

Edward sees the werewolves.

“I can’t believe these dogs have their picture out on the web!” Edward said in an annoyed tone. “They do not even look this good in real life. This was obviously photoshopped.” He growled again.

“I think they look awfully sexy in that picture,” I replied, “especially the one on the far left.”

Edward was obviously irritated by my answer so I backpedalled.

“You also have a sexy picture out on the web. Here, I’ll show you.” I sat beside him and searched for the New Moon picture passed from Twilighter to Twilighter.

Edward sees the impostor.

Edward sees the impostor.

Then, it happened.

“This isn’t me! This is just an actor trying to be me. This is incredibly insulting. I think somebody photoshopped this imposter’s head over Jason Lee’s The Crow poster. I look 107% better than this guy.” Edward bellowed.

I never thought that he would be so annoyed by these pictures. I didn’t know how to help him calm down. Then, I thought of an idea.

“Edward, would you like to see something incredibly funny?” I asked.

“Sure.” He replied.

Then, I brought him to this website called Letters to Rob. We spent the whole afternoon reading the funny letters to the imposter actor playing him. After Edward calmed down, I reassured him that he is way hotter than the werewolves and the imposter Edward. Edward shrugged and gave me one of his crooked smiles.

“I’m the world’s best predator, aren’t I?” Everything about me invites you in—my voice, my face, even my smell. As if I need any of that!” Edward said seductively.

I just had to put him in his place and burst his bubble a little.

“Actually, Edward. You smell like rubber.” I replied.

Getting Acquainted with Edward Cullen

My life with Edward Cullen started on the wrong foot. At least, on my end. Given Edward’s superhuman speed, I was unable to hide my obsessive Twilight and Edward Cullen-related stuff around the house. Lo and behold, just a few minutes after giving me his pasalubong, Edward saw signs of my Obsessive Cullen Disorder (OCD). Just a few feet from him was obsession evidence #1—my Twilight Saga book collection. He immediately jumped onto the bookshelf to check it out.

Edward sees the Twilight books.

Edward sees the Twilight books.

“I see that you read about my past…” Edward politely said. “Please know that I am ready to create a future with you,” he continued.

I was speechless. It’s a good thing my hubby was in this with me or I’d feel like I were being unfaithful. Suddenly, Edward looked up and saw obsession evidence #2–my Twilight clock.

Edward sees the Twilight clock.

Edward sees the Twilight clock.

“Wow, this is a phenomenal clock,” Edward said. “You should know, though, that from this day on, I will love you forever…every day of forever…”

Oh my gosh, I just died and went to twiven.

Then reality crept in… I realized that I’d better hide all my other OCD stuff like my Team Edward hoodie, my Twilight DVD, and my Twilight movie companion book. I have to make sure he doesn’t see my photo collection in my laptop. OMG. Edward can read my mind! He must think I’m obsessive! So much for keeping cool, calm and collected!

I tried to quickly hide all other OCD obsession evidence from Edward but he was too fast for me. Just a few milliseconds after seeing the clock, he saw obsession evidence #3—my customized Twilight Starbucks tumbler. I felt myself turn beet-red. I can’t believe Edward now knows that I sip my hot drinks while looking at his hotterness!

Edward jokingly climbs my Twilight tumbler.

Edward jokingly climbs my Twilight tumbler.

“You better hold on tight, spidermonkey.” Edward joked as he climbed onto my tumbler.

Ok, Edward touched the tumbler. I am NOT washing that tumbler ever again! Wait a minute, Edward probably just heard that thought. I’d better learn how to guard my thoughts around him.

“Hey, Edward! Check this out!” My hubby called from the bedroom.

Edward flew his way, with me running right behind him. I stopped in the doorway and gasped. Oh no, obsession evidence #4—my treasured Twilight premiere ticket! There is no way I can save my dignity now! It is definite: Edward now knows of my incurable Obsessive Cullen Disorder (OCD)!

Edward poses with my Twilight premiere ticket.

Edward poses with my Twilight premiere ticket.

“Look, I think the ticket looks better with the original Edward.” Edward mused.

All I could say in my tomato-faced glory was “Yeah, you do. You’re a real doll.”

Edward Cullen Arrives: A Dazzling Evening!

It’s a nice lazy Monday evening and I was relaxing with my hubby when there was a gentle but insistent knock on our bedroom door. I opened the door (in my midnight blue negligee, no less) and look who I found…

Edward Cullen arrives.

Edward Cullen arrives.

I honestly don’t know how Edward got into our house and climbed the stairs with his car (What happened to the Volvo? Oh well, the Volks is a German car too…) but you know Edward can do anything so…

“Edward!” I gasped. “What are you doing here?”

“Hi! I read your mind and I saw what you wanted to do to me and with me and it piqued my interest.” Edward replied.

At this point, I was already blushing profusely and thinking of how I’m going to explain Edward’s presence to my hubby. It turns out that my hubby was the reason why Edward came (more of that later). I invited him in and he sat on our bed.

Edward Cullen chats with me.

Edward Cullen chats with me.

After chatting with Edward (looking incredibly hot beside his amazing shiny black suitcase), I found out that my hubby actually fought with the saleslady from FB just to let him allow Edward to come to my house (permanently, of course). I won’t tell you why lest I get contacted by FB. If you are smart, you must have guessed by now that Edward and my hubby planned this surprise.

So, anyway…after listening to Edward talk about his long travel from Forks to Manila, I asked if he was hungry. I was afraid he might find it difficult to look for animal blood around. I had to protect my sleeping children. As debonair as he is, he’s still a vampire. He politely responded that his golden eyes shows how full he is. I told him that I’m glad that he came and that I plan to take him to a lot of places (and have him do a lot of things…tsk! tsk!). I think he’s excited to be in Manila even if the weather is not to his liking. Regardless, the weather is weird these days since it’s been a rainy summer so I think he’ll be ok.

Ever the gentleman, Edward came with a pasalubong. He said that he googled the Philippines and found that Filipinos are very hospitable. He also found that pasalubong is quite traditional so he came with a present.

Edward's pasalubong--a crystal (?!) charm!

Edward's pasalubong--a crystal (?!) charm!

When I saw his gift, I gasped! It’s just too much…it’s beauty is too much to bear…If you don’t know what it is, it’s a crystal heart charm (but you know it’s not really a crystal, right?). My face turned red and I think Edward read the ambivalence in my mind.

“I inherited quite a few baubles like this. I’ve given some to Esme and Alice and Bella. So, clearly this is not a big deal in any way…” Edward said.

“It’s beautiful.” I replied.

“My heart is just as silent,” he mused. “And it, too, is yours…”

I couldn’t answer. My heart was fluttering and I’m sure he could hear it. Needless to say, tonight is a dazzling evening. Thanks to my hubby for letting Edward Cullen come to our house. He is such an understanding and romantic enabler.

Welcome Edward…welcome to my home and my life. I hope you enjoy your time with me. We’re just getting started.